Halloween!

This will be the very first Halloween that I know I won't go overboard on candy! AMAZING.

Why? Because I have FINALLY developed this nice thing called self control! It's a great thing. Those two words were not even in my vocabulary last year. No way.

So my post today is about Halloween Candy. I got this email from Hungry Girl this morning and just HAD to share this. For those of you on WW... here are some points for common halloween candy!

Guilt-Free Classics! Tootsie Caramel Apple Pop - 60 calories, 0.5g fat (POINTS®value 1*) Charms Blow Pop - 60 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Dum Dum Pop - 25 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Lik-m-aid Fun Dip 0.5-oz. Pouch - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Jolly Rancher Hard Candy (3 Pieces), Original - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Jolly Rancher Lollipop - 60 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Laffy Taffy Miniature - 32 calories, 0.4g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Pixy Stix (7 Straws) - 60 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Smarties Candy Roll - 25 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Tootsie Pop Miniature (3 Pops) - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Tootsie Pop - 60 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Tootsie Roll Midgee (About 1-Inch Long) - 23 calories, 0.5g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Tootsie Roll Snack Bar (0.5 oz., About 3-Inches Long) - 50 calories, 1.25g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Twizzlers Strawberry Twists, Snack Size (3 Minis) or Individually Wrapped Twist - 30 calories, 0g fat (POINTS®value 1*)

Chocolate 101: Size Matters! Before you chew, know the difference between Snack Size, Fun Size, and Miniatures... Miniatures/Minis are the square-shaped morsels -- those babies are each about a quarter-ounce in weight. A Snack Size or Fun Size chocolate treat weighs in at a little more than a half-ounce and is usually about 2 inches long. Not all size-categorized treats are created equal. We've found seemingly identical Fun Size bars on shelves -- same brand, same flavor -- with varying weights and calorie counts. If you want to be extra-careful, we recommend going by the higher set of stats listed below.

Choc-O-Licious 3 Musketeers Mini Bar - 24 calories, 0.7g fat (POINTS® value 1*) 3 Musketeers Fun Size Bar - 63 - 70 calories, 2 - 2.25g fat (POINTS® value 1 - 2*) Almond Joy Snack Size Bar - 80 - 85 calories, 4.5g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Butterfinger Miniature - 45 calories, 1.75g fat (POINTS®value 1*) Butterfinger Fun Size Bar - 100 calories, 4g fat (POINTS®value 2*) Hershey's Kiss, Milk Chocolate - 25 calories, 1.4g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Hershey's Kiss, Pumpkin Spice or Candy Corn Flavor - 23 calories, 1.3g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Hershey's Mini ature Bar, Any Flavor - 42 calories, 2.5g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Hershey's Milk Chocolate Snack Size Bar - 67 calories, 4g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Milky Way Mini - 40 calories, 1.5g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Milky Way Fun Size Snack Bar - 75 - 80 calories, 3g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Nestle Crunch Miniature - 30 calories, 1.5g fat (POINTS®value 1*) Nestle Crunch Fun Size Bar - 60 - 70 calories, 3 - 3.3g fat (POINTS® value 1 - 2*) Reese's Miniature Peanut Butter Cup - 44 calories, 2.6g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Reese's Snack Size Peanut Butter Cup - 90 - 110 calories, 5 - 6.5g fat (POINTS® value 2 - 3*) SHOCKER! Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkin - 170 calories, 10g fat (POINTS® value 4*) Snickers Miniature - 45 calories, 2g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Snickers Fun Size Bar - 80 calories, 4g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Twix Mini Caramel Cookie Bar - 50 calories, 2.6g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Twix Fun Size Peanut Butter Cookie or Caramel Cookie Bar - 80 calories, 4 - 5g fat (POINTS® value 2*) York Dark Chocolate Covered Peppermint Pattie Pumpkin - 60 calories, 1.25g fat (POINTS® value 1*)

Goodie Bag (or Box)! Dots Mini Box - 75 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Junior Mints Snack Size Box - 80 calories, 1.5g fat (POINTS®value 2*) Life-Savers Gummies Pouch - 70 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) M&M's Fun Size Bag - 63 - 83 calories, 2.6 - 4g fat (POINTS® value 1 - 2*) Peanut M&M's Fun Size Bag - 67 - 90 calories, 3.3 - 5g fat (POINTS® value 2*) Mike and Ike Snack Size Pack - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS®value 1*) Milk Duds Snack Size Box - 53 calories, 2g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Nerds Mini Box - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Runts Mini Package - 70 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Skittles Fun Size Pack, Original - 53 - 80 calories, 0.5g - 1g fat (POINTS® value 1 - 2*) Sour Patch Kids Treat Size Package - 55 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Starburst Original Fruit Chews Fun Size Package (2 Chews) - 40 calories, 0.8g fat (POINTS® value 1*) Swedish Fish Treat Size Package - 55 calories, 0g fat (POINTS®value 1*) Sweetarts Pouch - 50 calories, 0g fat (POINTS® value 1*)

Sooo there you have it. Hopefully this can come in handy for anyone on WW.

Tomorrow I will post a video on here. I have never tried doing that before (except for my tap videos). But this time, I plan on doing a "VLOG" post. So I will actually be talking! I have been wanting to do it for a few weeks now but I had laryngitis. I am feeling much better now so I will create one and post it tomorrow!

Haven't had a chance to get someone to take my "after" picture for me. Soon!

Til tomorrow,

Karla =)

2nd Post of the Day: Junior Mints & Weight Loss

Ah, Junior Mints. I just downed a WHOLE pack. The mini pack…with like… 6 mints in it. Ohh the sugar high I am experiencing right now. I don’t eat chocolate during the week (with the exception of Cold Stone this week). So, when I do eat chocolate, the sugar just rushes to my head real fast. Usually I just eat them one by one slowly as each one dissolves in my mouth. I don’t ever eat them unless it’s Halloween and seldomly at a movie. So, it’s important to savor every last delightful moment. Junior Mints are my favorite Halloween candy by far.

My brother never liked Junior Mints, so he always gave me all of his in exchange for Almond Joys, Reeses, and Butterfingers. The three candies I hate.

I would count each box of Junior Mints that I would get each year. I would get one box in my lunch for grade school. I would devour them straight from the box before I even saw them. Like, who knows what could have been in those boxes. What if Junior Mints weren’t actually in the box? I would have never known because I would open the box right into my mouth. What a sight it would have been if their had been cockroaches in there instead..

But, that was then. This is now. I was more physically fit back then. Dancing, gymnastics, horseback riding, tennis, and color guard kept me busy. Yes, all at the same time.

But now, things have slowed down. I just dance.

So, I can’t just open up a box of Junior Mints straight into my mouth.

Tonight though… I tried.

Never. Again.

I feel like I’m going to throw up. And you know what? I feel great about that. Because I know that my body cannot handle my horrible eating habits from the past. My stomach likes to be fed the right way, the healthy way. It’s amazing how much Weight Watchers has changed my life. I loved it when I first started seeing the changes, and when my roommate joined, I loved seeing her happy when she saw changes...and now that my other roommate joined, I look forward to seeing her happy about her changes as well. It is an awesome feeling. I am at such a happy place right now. After about 10 years of hating my body, I finally think I won the battle. I fully accept myself.

SO…why do I still keep this blog you might ask? Well… I still have not really met my goal of losing 30 pounds. I have 9 more pounds to lose. So, I am still on my journey. Writing in this blog has kept me honest with myself and the supporters that I have are overwhelming. Thank you all for your constant support. I am truly grateful. Even though this blog may be boring or slightly off topic at times, the support that I receive is amazing. Thank you, thank you, thank you. My blog is here to stay =)

*I weighed myself today when I got home from school. Was just in the mood to do it. I am down a pound. But, today is not my weigh in day. That’s tomorrow. So, we’ll see if this one pound loss sticks. That would be nice.

Dance tonight felt good. I really gave it my all tonight. I felt thin, I felt happy, I felt confident and it was wonderful.

I even got a few compliments on how I look. Well, I guess you could call them compliments. There is a woman that I used to work with who told me that I looked real skinny. Before I could say anything back, she said, “Have you been eating?”

What is that supposed to mean? Does it look like I’m unhealthy?

I guess to the people who have known me for a while, I seem WAY thinner. To a person who hasn’t known me when I was heavier, I think I seem fairly normal. People just aren’t used to seeing me 21 pounds lighter I guess. I just wish people’s comments were more, …kind?

Tomorrow my goal is to put before and after pictures up! It has been 9 months and 21 pounds lost… so I figure I should. Plus, Eve did it and she looks so amazing!! Eve, I am so proud of you!! I thought I would steal your idea!! =)

Look for that tomorrow!

Until then,

Karla =)

A Whole Mess of Things

Just a heads up: This post isn't really about weight or anything. Just another update about my life! Though, of course...dance is mingled in somewhere in this post!

So I just got a text from a co worker of mine for that job I had over the summer. Mind you, it is 7:30am right now. It reads: "I am not going to beat around the bush here...I need alcohol"

I feel like texting her back saying, "Dear Underaged Friend... First of all, I am not getting you alcohol, and second of all.. Don't ever, ever, ever, ever text me at 7:30am EVER again asking me to"

Sorry, just had to get that out.

Anyway, yesterday was not as good as I thought it was going to be. Teaching the little ones in the morning went fine. Though, I was greeted by a $25 ticket for the second time on my windshield because I had parked in a non-spot. I know, I didn't learn my lesson. I was literally parked their overnight and I get blasted with a ticket. The parking lot for my dorm building is ridiculously small and we are not allowed to park anywhere else. So really, I don't know what they want us to do besides park in a non-spot when there isn't anywhere else to park. I'm considering not paying and going to court or whatever they make me do. We'll see.

I had my one class that went okay, except for I had to walk in the down pouring rain to get there and by the time I got there, I was soaked from head to toe. You know that nasty horizontal rain that you can't escape from no matter what size umbrella you have or how expensive your raincoat is? Yeah. It was that kind of rain. I was drenched.

It seems also that whenever it rains, I become instantly uncoordinated. My roommates laugh all the time because I'll come back to the room soaked (aka... I slip and fall all the time when it's raining out). The soaking wet leaves don't help my balance either because they are slippery...but I guess I'm just making excuses. My roommates blame it on my fast walking. I don't know what it is but I have fallen twice now within the month on rainy days. Right into huge puddles. It's been wonderful. BUT... good news... I didn't fall yesterday!

My roomie found herself a Halloween costume. We were both supposed to be football players but she didn't want to look exactly like me. So, she is going to be a Butterfly. I am kind of excited for Halloween... I wish I was still young enough to trick or treat. Everyone that I'm friends with usually go out to bars all dressed up in their typical skimpy outfits. That's not me. I'm not too much of a bar person. I think bars are like the non-cyber, filthier version of eharmony (if you know what I mean) and I really don't need that at the moment!

Tomorrow night I was supposed to go and see Lorraine Warren. She is a paranormal investigator and she lives about 10 minutes away from my house. She is coming to my school to give a Halloween presentation. Last year, she showed us a video clip of an exorcism that still scares me to this day. BUT.. my friend has ditched me for work and I am not sure who else to go with. Definitely am not going by myself either! So, it looks like I'll be laying low on Friday and I don't even think the World Series is on on Friday either. It's gonna be a boring night!!

On a more serious note, my Aunt had surgery yesterday on her nose. It was kind of the same thing I had to have after I broke my nose. Apparently there were some complications and I started to get pretty nervous...but she is thankfully okay. She just has some issues with breathing and swallowing. She is in my dance class with me tonight, and she won't be coming tonight because of the surgery. So I'll be going solo. Maybe I can do another tap video tonight...although the World Series game 2 in on tonight so, we'll see.

I have been really wanting to go and visit my dance teacher. She is the 94 year old woman that I talk about from time to time on here. She is the reason why I dance, she is my idol. If only my life could be carried out like hers was. Wow.. I could die happy =)

Anyway, she is home from her rehabilitation center and I have not gone to visit her yet. She has a live-in aid so that may be kind of awkward. She is also losing it a little bit so I don't know if she would remember me. I may go with my Mom and Aunt sometime soon. I don't want to have regrets of not seeing her. She doesn't come to my dance classes anymore. She is in a wheel chair and can't walk too well. It's hard not seeing her smiling face while I dance. It's weird to see the empty chair that she normally sits in. I miss her =(

Below is her and I immediately after our last of 5 shows in June 2008

Below is my group and the Mom's group after performing for our teacher at the rehabilitation center. This photo made the paper. I'm far left. My Mom and my Aunt are dead center standing next to each other with wavy dark brown hair. Mrs. Lathrop is so beautiful.

Until next time,

Karla =)

Paranormal Activity+Weight Loss

So I went to see that movie (Paranormal Activity) last night. It was pretty interesting to say the least. It was different from any movie that I have ever seen. If I were to rate how scary it was on a scale from 1-10... I would say... 6. Lets just say, I was able to sleep last night with no problems! But, I think the movie is worth seeing for it's uniqueness. The whole movie is filmed with one camera. And there are like 4 characters in the movie. It's simple, easy to follow...and I have never really seen a movie done that way in theaters. The only thing I didn't like too much about it was that it seemed to drag on and on and on until the very last scene where things finally got exciting....and then the movie was just ..over. But, again, that's what makes it interesting. It really makes you think.

And there ends my movie review.

*Today should be a good day. I have to teach from 9am-11am. Then I have one class from 2-315pm.. and then I have a few hours to myself! WOOHOO!! My roommates and I are going to Cold Stone Creamery for dinner for our monthly "bonding" time. Then were going to hit up the mall to see if one of my roommates can find a last minute Halloween costume. Then later tonight, one of my roommates and I signed up for a "Hall Activity" in our dorm. The whole 7th floor are going to paint pumpkins together. That should be interesting. But, it's a way of getting to know people since I don't even know the names of the people who live next to me.

So as of a few days ago, I inspired another one of my roommates to join WW. Well, it was all her choice but I like to think I inspired her a little!! =)

So, now 3 out of 4 of us girls are on WW. It's actually kind of nice because we can all cook dinner now for each other and we are all in the same boat with counting and tracking points.

It is so amazing how much I have changed and grown as a person from when I started WW on January 13, 2009 until now. It has been 9 months. I will never go back to the way I was before, the way I looked before, the way I ate before. It was a tough road to get to where I am now. Even as a kid, I was always ALWAYS ALWAYS criticized about my weight, being a dancer and all. Criticized by past boyfriends, family members, and even strangers.

Although I feel as though I haven't totally reached my goal yet... I finally feel pretty comfortable in my own skin. Of course, I always have my "fat" days where anything I try on looks hideous. I have my "ugly" days where nothing I do can make myself feel better. The difference is, I had those days EVERYDAY 9 months ago. They don't happen too often anymore.

Losing weight is hard. I fought hard to lose. I bitched and complained on here all the time when it got frustrating. But I did it. And I am still doing it. YOU can do it. It CAN be done. Find the strength, find the will. Your weight does not define you. Don't let your weight take control of your life. YOU are in control of YOUR own life. Our weight cannot and should not control us. Don't let your happiness become compromised because of your weight. Our society is a bit screwed up in my opinion when it comes to weight. Don't let that get you down. Being healthy is what's important. Let's be realistic, no one is perfect. We are all imperfect. Weight loss is a tough road to travel on. But well worth the ride in the end.

Rise above.

Til next time,

Karla =)

Another crazy dance post

There is something so fulfilling about crossing something off of a list. I was able to cross off 5 things off my list of goals yesterday! So, I have half of my goals accomplished and its only Tuesday! Sweeeeet.

Since my one month dance class has ended.. it was weird to be able to have so much time last night. Don't get me wrong... I still have my dance class at home that I attend every single Thursday. I don't know what I would do without dance in my life..

For me, dance is a lot like blogging. I am able to release all of my emotions, all of my stress that has built up over the week. Dance is a form of nonverbal communication you know! I believe that without dance, I would only be half a person. Because for me, dance is another form of expression. I can speak and write ... but then there is dance. Both of these are forms of expression. Without the dance part... I would be lost.... which sounds SOOO corny I know. But that is just how I feel. Thank God for dance.

But really, I shouldn't be thanking God for dance. I should be thanking God for music. I should be thankful for the many, many talented musicians who give me the music to dance to. Because, I believe that we ALL have the gift of dance. Everyone CAN dance. Whether or not they might be good or bad at it depends on how they internalize the music. Whether or not they are really attached to the music and feel a connection with each and every beat. There are times at dance where I am dancing horribly because I have no connection to the music. So, YES... everyone CAN dance! So, really, music is the gift. Thank God for music.

Most people who know me pretty well, especially my roommates.. know that I am always craving the spotlight. I am always dancing in the room and sometimes I know that I am driving them nuts! It's just habit. I love to entertain by way of dancing...even if no one is watching. =)

So today I have a video. A video of a man who loves dancing probably just as much as I do. He loved it so much that when he lost his leg at age 12... he taught himself how to tap with his wooden peg leg. Check this out: Peg Leg Bates

*Today should be a good day. I have classes until 12... I don't have to teach today! WOOHOO! I have an advisement meeting to figure out what classes I have to take next semester. I'm going to get a workout in today at some point. Maybe do some Pilates.. Then I am going to see the movie, Paranormal Activity tonight. Anyone seen it? Like it, hate it?

Til next time,

Karla =)

Goals for the Week

I think I want to start a new tradition where I will post my goals for the week and then at the end of the week, see if I have met them or not. I do this every week on a piece of paper that I put on my desk. I write out all the things that I absolutely must accomplish. I am anal like that. I write down EVERYTHING. I have so many reminders everywhere all over my desk, my walls, my phone. I must be organized and make things easy for myself...because if I don't... chaos sets in and I freak out.

So, here are my goals that are coming directly from this piece of paper on my desk.

-do the whole "go apple picking/pumpkin picking/corn mazing" thing (I got half of this done!)

-carve a pumpkin

-figure out my language arts lesson plan for the 1st graders

-Unit rationale for the 1st graders

-Multicultural lesson plan for Kindergartners

-Go see Paranormal Activity so that I won't be able to sleep ever again. (this movie looks creepy!)

-Go to the mall with my roommate so that she can get her Halloween costume

-Say Happy Birthday/catch up with my cousin whom I haven't spoke to in years

-Lose at least 1 pound

-workout with the Biggest Loser dvd

-bake WW Chocolate Halloween Cupcakes

-Don't overeat on Halloween

That last one is a big one. I remember every Halloween when I was younger.. it was like my brother and I always had a competition to see how many pieces of candy we could eat before we puked. No, not really. But, our Mom never let us eat junk food unless of course it was Halloween, or Easter, or Christmas...etc. So whenever these holidays came around, I was all over it.

So since our Mom never really gave us any junk food.. How did I get so big? I can answer that in one word.

COLLEGE.

I gained SOO much. It was horrible and will never ever ever happen again. I was miserable and depressed. SOO unhappy with myself. I look back on old dance pictures and dance videos and I look completely unhealthy and completely unhappy.

But now... my eating habits are SO different. I can't even imagine stuffing my face with Halloween candy anymore. I would probably puke because my body is so used to eating healthy.

One night a month, my roommates and I have "roommate bonding" night. We all go to Cold Stone Creamery for ice cream. I get my ice cream and it just goes right through me. Does not agree with me at all. Back in freshman year of college, my roommates and I would have ice cream for dessert EVERY night!!! I can not even begin to think about doing that now. I think the word DESSERT is not even really in my vocabulary anymore. Yes, on the weekends I will have dessert on occasion...like birthday cake for my brother's birthday. I don't deprive myself if I really want it. But, I can definitely live without it. Whereas 3 years ago... I just HAD to have it....or so I thought.

Here is the recipe for the chocolate cupcakes I'm making for a Halloween party I'm going to on Halloween. This recipe is stolen from WW. I have made them before (not for Halloween).. and they are awesome!

POINTS® Value: 3 Servings: 24 Preparation Time: 25 min Cooking Time: 32 min Level of Difficulty: Moderate

We topped these marshmallow-frosted cupcakes with a spooky web and plastic spiders for some sweet Halloween fun.

Ingredients

	2 spray(s) cooking spray
	2 1/2 cup(s) all-purpose flour
	2 cup(s) McNeil Nutritionals SPLENDA No Calorie Sweetener
	1 cup(s) unsweetened cocoa
	1/2 cup(s) cornstarch
	1 tsp baking soda
	1 tsp table salt
	1 cup(s) fat-free egg substitute
	2 cup(s) water
	1 cup(s) light corn syrup
	1 1/2 cup(s) sugar
	1/2 cup(s) water
	2 medium egg white(s)
	1/2 tsp table salt
	1 Tbsp light corn syrup
	1 tsp vanilla extract
	4 tsp decorating icing, orange

Instructions

• Preheat oven to 350ºF. Coat two 12-hole muffin tins with cooking spray and line with cupcake wrappers.*
  
  
• In a large bowl, combine flour, Splenda, cocoa, cornstarch, baking soda and 1 teaspoon of salt; set aside.
  
  
• In a medium bowl, whisk together egg substitute, 2 cups of water and 1 cup of light corn syrup.
  
  
• Spoon egg mixture into flour mixture and mix until completely smooth and incorporated.
  
  
• Pour batter into muffin tins until each hole is completely full. Bake for 15 to 20 minutes, or until a tester inserted in the center of a cupcake comes out clean. Allow to cool completely.
  
  
• While cupcakes cool, make frosting: Heat a medium pot of water to boiling.
  
  
• In a medium metal or glass bowl, beat sugar, 1/2 cup of water, egg whites, 1/2 teaspoon of salt, 1 tablespoon of corn syrup and vanilla extract with an electric mixer on high speed for 1 minute.
  
  
• Place bowl of frosting over rapidly boiling water (you are creating a double boiler) and beat at high speed until the mixture forms soft peaks, about 7 to 10 minutes.
  
  
• Remove frosting from heat and beat on high speed until mixture is thick enough to spread, about 5 minutes. Frost cupcakes, create a spider web-like design on each with icing and decorate as desired. Yields 1 cupcake per serving.
• 
  

Until next time,

Karla =)

A Mix of Thoughts

What inspires you? What is it that gets you up in the morning? What is it that makes you want to get up out of bed and face the day?

For me... what gets me out of bed in the morning is my music. The music I listen to, the music that is constantly playing in my head. It's my goals. What I am working towards. My education. Becoming a teacher. I get up for the Kindergartners, the first graders, who look forward to when I walk into their classroom. I get up because I have drive. I have motivation. I'm not just going to lay back and let the day unfold without me.

I get up to make others proud of me. My Grandparents whom I love so dearly. They live in Maine. Far, far away. I get up in the morning to make them proud. I work hard in school because they never got the chance to. I get up in the morning because, well, I can. I have 2 feet. I have the strength. Something we take advantage of.

My Grandfather who I look up to, the one I idolize, the one I try to be like... he came to my dance recital from Maine with my Grandma for the very first time this past year. He said to me, "Karla... you have a gift. You have the gift of being able to hear the music in a way that no one else does. Embrace this gift, you were born to entertain."

Talk about being teary eyed. Man. I never expected to ever hear him say anything like that. He is not a very emotional guy. He will never know how much that meant to me.

It's comments like that that make me get up in the morning. The comments like that that make me think my life is worth living.

*I never believed in myself. I still have issues believing in myself; believing that I CAN do something. Believing that I can be whoever I want to be as long as I put my heart and soul into it. So, often I need that extra push. That one person saying, you are good for something. You are here for a reason. You CAN do this.

So I am challenging all of you, to go out... go up to that family member or close friend who may need that extra push. We all need one once in awhile. Inspire that person to do good things with their life. Motivate that person to reach the stars, go for their dreams. Sometimes people don't realize just how talented they are. Just how truly wonderful they are. So compliment someone, make their day. You will be a better person yourself for doing it. Compliments always make both parties feel more whole. Happier. The person will never forget. I still haven't forgotten those words from my Grandfather and never will. Because the most powerful words, are those that are uplifting, inspiring, and that come from a dear friend.

You can make a difference in someones life.

Enjoy your weekend =)

Til next time,

Karla =)

"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music.”

– Angela Monet

Tap Videoooo!

Okay SO.. I have done this before. I few weeks ago I made a video and put it on here. But it got deleted!! So... I just HAD to do another one. But this time, I don't talk because I have like laryngitis or something. I swear, whenever the seasons change I get these damn sore throats. No runny nose, no sneezing.. nothing like that... just a stupid sore throat. So, I have no voice really... and when I do have a voice, I sound a lot like a man!!

So here is me doing what I do best....TAPPING!

Here is the thing about this. I put the camera on the floor as I danced on a piece of wood. I lug this piece of wood all the way upstairs to the living room almost everyday while I'm home. And I sometimes practice for HOURS on end. That is my life. How exciting.

So, the camera looks like it's bouncing. It's not. The wood that I am dancing on is though...haha. Also... it is rather dark... because I was DYING of heat and didn't feel like having all the lights beat down on me. Soooo.. my apologies for that. There is nothing really to see anyway... it's all about the sound =)

This is a little routine that I made up myself. It's to a Britney Spears song. Not too much of a Britney fan but the song has a great beat for tapping. =)

And I just realized... this is my third post in one day. Haha ... my bad.

Tomorrow is weigh day ... cross your fingers!!!

Til next time,

Karla =)

Happy Birthday Little Brother! =)

Where has the time gone?

Today is my little brother's birthday. Except he's not so little anymore. He's 18! What the heck?? That means I'm really old too. I woke up today and thought back on the good old days. The days where we both didn't have a care in the world. The days where we both ran off outside for hours on end, exploring through the acres of land that our then new house was built on. We would be gone for hours, walking through the woods, our pants tucked inside our socks so that ticks could not get in. Mom always made us do that. We LOVED being outside and the one sound that would make us run toward home was a large bell that Mom attached to the house. It was the "get your butt back inside" bell.

But those days are over. Now I rarely see my brother because I live at school. I come home and he is usually leaving somewhere in my Mom's car. My Mom changes our school picture every year. She has 2 frames. One for me, one for my brother. There are 12 pictures in mine, from every year at school. Now, there are 12 pictures in his since she just recently put his senior picture in the frame. He looks so old in it. So mature. No longer my little brother.

We never always got along. Half the time, we were fighting or making our parents crazy. But I think we are finally both at the stage now where we know that we will always be each others best friend. And, for that... I am happy.

I was looking back on old pictures this morning. I don't have any of my brother and I when we were younger on my computer.... but I do have me when I was younger. I have probably posted this before. But, I'll do it again.

These are my first 3 years of dancing. I had the whole "full bang" look going on thanks to my Mother who is still upset to this day that I FINALLY got rid of bangs. Haha.

It is fun to look back. It makes you realize that you don't know who you are unless you know where you have been, where you come from. When I go home for dance, I will try and find a really old picture of my brother and I and put it up here, and then compare it to what we look like now.

I also want to do another tap dance video tonight and post it on here. We'll see how that goes.

This post really had nothing to do with dance or my weight or anything, but it was just nice to travel back in time for awhile. =)

More later,

Karla =)

Judge Free Zone

Today's post is a small spin off of another post that I read today from, Mrs. Sheila at one pretty little box. The post is here. I hope she doesn't mind me doing this. I have been reading her blog for some time now and her posts have always inspired me. This time, her post inspired me to write my own thoughts about judging others and comparing yourself to others. I encourage all of you to go check out her amazing blog.

So here it goes.

We alllll do it. As Mrs. Sheila mentioned. We all judge people and try and compare ourselves to others and what we think we should look like or be like or whatever. I have friends that find themselves feeling better about themselves if they see someone whom they feel is not as attractive as they are. And... I will admit... I HAVE DONE THAT.

I have struggled with this for a long time. With dance practice, dance competitions, and the very high and intense competitiveness that is involved with dancing.... I have dealt with the judging and comparing before. I am an expert at it. I am an expert at looking at all the skinny, beautiful dancers that I see EVERYDAY and wishing that I TOO looked like them or danced like them. "IF ONLY I was that thin.... IF ONLY I had her body structure....IF ONLY, IF ONLY, IF ONLY"

I drove myself insane. There were times in dance practice where I would be too focused on how depressed I was that I didn't look like most of the other girls, that I was kicked out of class. Yes, my dance class is THAT hardcore. The instructor noticed that I was so zoned out and was not getting any of the steps right. She said, "Karla, your head doesn't seem in it today, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Come back when your ready to dance"

Of course, I came back the very next practice. But was I really ready to dance? Was I ready to JUST focus on dancing and not on the fact that I don't feel pretty, skinny... all those things?

No. I was not.

That was almost a year ago. Am I ready now?

Absolutely.

I have freed myself. I go to dance with my head held high. I am no longer embarrassed, no longer ashamed. No longer feel the need to compare myself to others. No longer feel the need to CONSTANTLY judge. It was ruining my friendships with my teammates. It was ruining my dancing. It was ruining our dancing as a group. It was ruining my life.

Sure, it had a lot to do with me "bettering myself". I lost the weight. I lost 21 pounds. But it is not just about the weight. It's about me finally accepting myself. Accepting who I am and being okay with that. Being okay with the fact that I will NEVER be a size 0 or 2 or 4 no matter how much weight I lose. Being okay with the fact that I don't have the typical dancer body but I can assure you that I can kick ass on the dance floor. Being okay with the fact that I will ALWAYS have cellulite!!!! ;-)

I got my life back when I stopped judging... when I stopped comparing. I even think I have more friends because of it. I am more approachable. More open. More me!

I love me.

Do you love you?

til next time,

Karla =)

It's Tuesdaaaay

I couldn't think of a very unique title.

Anyway- Yesterday I went to dance class and the instructor is on vacation in Boston (so jealous) so we had a sub. The first half hour of the class was so boring for me because the sub had no clue what she was doing. Then... she decides to stop us mid-class and have us try Zumba which I guess is her forte.

Oh. My. God.

I am a dancer. Have been for 16 years. I love dancing. I love to move. I am never really embarrassed dancing because I don't think that there is any wrong way of dancing.... BUT.... I must say.... I WAS EMBARRASSED. Zumba was WAY out of my comfort zone.

But... then again.... I am SO glad that I tried it. It is sooo much fun because all I ended up doing was laughing at how badly I was doing it. I'm sure with practice, it would obviously get better. It definitely keeps your heart pumping though...wow!!

I know that soooo many people love Zumba and it's like this new fitness craze out there, but I just don't think it's my thing particularly.

ALSO... yesterday I won a $300 gift certificate to this laser hair removal/cellulite reducer place. I got REALLY excited because any place that claims that they can get rid of cellulite is like a gift from God!! But then I found out that in order to get rid of cellulite... you need to have SEVERAL appointments to this doctor who does the "surgery". It's also like a bajillion dollars. AND... they don't even guarantee that you'll get results. WHAAAT??

Even after MONTHS of losing weight.... my cellulite will ALWAYS be present. No matter how many different workouts I do that are supposed to help. SO... I think I will just have to live with it for the rest of my life!! Which is fine with me! ;-)

....Ohh boy, today I have a mid term in one of my classes. I hope I do okay... I studied here and there last night while simultaneously working on a HUGE paper that I had due today.

I lost my voice last night and it has not come back today either. So, I was supposed to teach Kindergarten today but called out sick. There is no way I would have been able to do it with no voice. There are 30 Kindergartners!!!!

I picked out my Halloween costume! I am going to be a football player hahahaa. I have a pink Jet's jersey and some black dance shorts and knee high socks. Who knows if I am even doing anything on Halloween... but.... I do have a costume now! WOohoO!

Alright.... I'm out!

til next time...

Karla =)